Take A Hike

Make it stop, make it stop, make it stop. For four years, I've been submitting crap to the Iron Warrior just so I would have content for my column. Now I can finally stop wasting my time. It's about time that "Take A Zhance" takes a hike. I've complained enough. Does anybody believe the stuff I write? Does anybody even read my column? I should have given it up years ago. I should have quit while I was ahead. It's just dragged on for too many terms. I'm sure that all the students in the engineering faculty will breathe a sigh of relief after this issue. They won't have to put up with my crap ever again. I'm sure they didn't appreciate me spoon-feeding them all this philosophy of life, university, and engineering. I'll tell you a little secret. I don't believe a word of the nonsense that I write. I'm a malicious man. I write about all these things hoping that some poor fool actually believes what I say and follows my advice. Boy, are they in for a surprise. You are indeed "Taking A Zhance" when you follow the words of "Take A Zhance." Have you ever wondered what happened to that guy who mysteriously vanished from your class one year? He probably took my advice and failed out. You might find him flipping burgers at the McDonald's at King and Columbia. Don't let it happen to you. Friends don't let friends read "Take A Zhance."

One might wonder why I'm even bothering to write this article. It's not mandatory. It's just eating up my spare that I could be using to do something for more enjoyable. Indeed, I think I will stop writing here and save some of my brain cells for more useful activities. Later, and thank goodness it's all done!

Read the companion article.