Everybody Wants To Rule The World

©1999 Zhan Huan Zhou

Everybody wants to rule the world. Thank goodness Engineers are the ones doing the ruling right now, not those dumb Artsies.

Imagine a world where everyone is an engineer. Every gadget that we have would include twenty times more features than necessary, be one hundred times more complicated, and be one thousand times more expensive. But none of those are a concern because in this fantasy world as everyone is an engineer. We would be able to come up with a practical manufacturing process for every product. We are smart enough to figure out how every product works without a manual. Finally, we are making so much money in our engineering jobs that we don't care about how much the thing costs and besides, it's a damn cool toy.

Summing up an infinite geometric series and approximating the answer solves a suffering world economy. Political conflicts are resolved by analyzing the free body diagram of each country and analyzing the external forces acting on it. World hunger vanishes because we find the resonant frequency of crop production and use it to produce an infinite amount of food. The world is a complete utopia.

We have no need for those 'other' people because they serve no useful role in the world. MBA graduates only become CEOs of companies. Mathematicians are researching new mathematics concepts that are completely useless. Examples of this include ludicrous ideas as calculus, imaginary numbers, and trigonometry. Physicists came up with ridiculous ideas such as the Laws of Motion and Current-Voltage relationships.

Engineers are the ones who make things happen. They take available knowledge and make it into something useful. And of course, since they know everything already there is to know they can make anything into a reality.

So remember, when you graduate from engineering, you will know how to build anything and solve all of the world's problems.